scottish signage

Today's soundtrack:
"BCC" by Buck 65 feat. John Southworth 
"The Score" by Samantha Savage Smith
"Yer Spring" by Hey Rosetta
"Niagara" by Ohbijou

It's a blustery day here in Cellardyke. The wind has been averaging around 45 km/ph for over 12 hours now. Deck chairs are rearranging themselves. I know I haven't blogged in a bit, but since I have a paper to finish for this weekend's conference, the best I can do is a short guide to Scottish signage.

Lesson 1: How to tell a good hairdresser from a bad one

I really don't know which side this place in St. Andrews falls on, but even if it's the latter, at least you get a free shot of whisky out of the deal.  I feel obliged to point out that with the slight space between hair and cut, it's possible that you get a shot for every single hair cut.

Lesson 2: Scottish priorities are starch-based

Giggling about McNulty's aside (which I assume only serves bottles of Jameson's and lake trout), the top-billing of the almighty potato shouldn't really come as a surprise to me.  But top-billing above coffee?  Coffee?!  That sweet, sweet nectar of the gods?!  The only thing that can change grumpy grunty morning Kate into slightly less grumpy and grunty morning Kate?!  I suspect that if the supermarket sold more whole beans and less instant coffee, this country would come around to the Pacific Northwest attitude towards coffee.  Ritual sacrifice to Starbucks remaining optional, obviously.

Lesson 3: Unapologetically hilarious street signs

Pointing and giggling will mark you as a North American, just as taking a picture of the "Cosy Neuk" down the way is how we tell who's a Dutch tourist (hey, if you're looking for high-brow humour here, you may have made a larger mistake).  I should point out, for extra credit in today's lessons, that "wynd" is Scots for a narrow lane or alley.  The more you know.